The Esoteric Objects

I have an extensive collection of esoteric objects that reflect my love of various movies, television shows, and numerous hobbies. When people find one of the objects in my esoteric collection they tend to have one of three reactions: 1) Oh you like such and such. 2) What the hell is that? 3) OH MY GOD YOU HAVE A...! It is fun to watch their reactions. What is the most fun is when someone else is in the know. They see the object, recognize what it is or what it means, and they appreciate its coolness. Some things are just a subtle wink and a nod and I appreciate that.

Though I refuse to pay 2 day shipping which would ensure arrival before Christmas I stumbled upon something that is very very cool. At least to me it is extremely cool and it will add to my esoteric collection. I can't wait for the first person to notice it on my wall and just grin in amazement.

Merry Christmas folks. I hope your holiday shopping is already finished.

Spotty Internet Access Just Plain Sucks

The Fabulously Gay Roommate has been monkeying around with our wireless network. He's been trying to get the wireless printer to find our network and print! The wireless capability of the printer was the big reason I got the printer before the end of last year and yet it is the one thing we haven't gotten to work!

The Good: FGR says he can no see the printer on our wireless LAN.
The Bad: We still can't print to it.
The Suck: I have to screw around with my network settings on my laptop for at least 15 minutes before I connect to our wireless network. IF I CONNECT AT ALL!

If you don't hear from me for a few days assume that between too many hours at work, too many hours on the road, and the roommate's infernal modification of our network that I'm not dead, I'm just silent!

Unforgiveable Sin

2 weeks ago I missed Battlestar Galactica. I was out of town on a road trip. Sure I've missed a Friday night here or there, but I could always count on my parents to record it. I was always caught up before watching a new episode. Last Friday I planned to catch up on what I missed before the new episode to be shown. Ye olde Digital Video Recorder was missing. It self-destructed my parents said.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is safe to say BSG is one of the few shows that lasted more than a season that I've watched every episode from start to finish in order. Babylon 5 was the only other one I can think of. My streak was about to end. The old girl was tearing herself apart, Boomer was escaping with Hera, and I was missing out. With all my loyalty to the series it was unforgivable that I missed the episode.

So I caught last week's episode and was treated to pure garbage. The first of the three part series finale and it was pure garbage. 30 minutes of flashbacks. Whose bright idea was that? Shouldn't the writers be resolving storylines? Shouldn't the writers be setting up the final battle? Shouldn't the writers be showing the grit and resolve of the main characters?

Nope we got flapping pigeons in a skylight, a baby shower, and Baltar's father calling Baltar a git. What was the point!!!!!!! I've had BSG episodes that weren't as good as others, but this was the first time an episode bored me. Perhaps that episode set up the other two for the series finale. I'll find out this Friday when Sci-Fi shows them. Even if true an episode needs to stand alone enough to not be boring. The writers and producers failed in that respect. How unforgivable that is to me.

PS: Luckily Sci-Fi has the episode I missed online. It was awesome!!!! Why did that level of awesomeness continue?

KITT vs KARR: The Smackdown Of Lameness!

The original Knight Rider is the quintesence of early 1980's Glen Larson cheesetasticness. David Hasselhoff and a talking indestructible car as crime fighters. BRILLANT! Combined with The A-Team, The Dukes Of Hazzard, Airwolf, The Equalizer, and MacGyver there was no better run of television shows.

My childhood has been tampered due to the abomination known as the current Knight Rider series. The movie was horrible. I've tried to watch something of the new series, but after 5 minutes my stomach curdles at the sheer volume of crap I'm forced to endure. Bad writing, bad stories, horrible logic, and too many characters.

For tonight, if there was one episode to watch this was it: KITT vs KARR. In the original series KARR was the evil prototype Trans Am that would eventually become our noble crimefighting KITT. In the new series KARR was the evil Mustang/Transformer that would eventually become the new KITT, the Ford Mustang able to transform into any other Ford product available (and somehow a submarine too from what I've heard). Voices by the the original actor, Peter Cullen, the previews showed ANGRY OPTIMUS PRIME trying to destroy KITT. (Peter Cullen was the voice of Optimus Prime in both the cartoon series and the recent movie.) The though of ANGRY OPTIMUS PRIME destroying the horrific new KITT and Michael Knight had appeal to me. I decided to watch the entire show.

NBC writers in their wisdom decided to finally introduce KARR at minute 52 of the show. Oh I see, they'll make this a two parter! FINALLY introduce the BIG BAD near the end of the first episode; therefore, forcing me to commit to a second episode. They want ratings and using horrible writing and sluggish plot development to achieve this! I gave the writers and studio execs too much credit.

On the off chance you actually want to see the show I suggest you stop reading now as I'll ruin it for you otherwise.

Instead of a dramatic cliffhanger, the new and lame Michael Knight with a stripped of his invulnerablity KITT decided to turboboost through the chest of KARR, who is in robot mode. Shouldn't KARR also be invulnerable? Even if KARR isn't invulnerable for some reason the giant killer robot is vulnerable to any redneck who decides to catapult a car though the robotic chest. WTF! That is the lamest killer robot ever!

Almost as bad is the fact KARR had a human in the chest cavity (has to merge with a human for some reason) and that person is now on the ground looking like he's suffering from a cold and a nosebleed. If a car turboboosted through the passenger compartment of your automobile wouldn't you be chunky salsa at this point?

The evil character that spent an entire episode building up to was destroyed in two minutes. THAT WAS THE BIG BAD! If the General Lee, or even worse Roscoe P. Coltrane's police car, could jump off a dirt ramp to destroy your killer robot, then you're not worthy to be KITT's nemesis.

I'm so glad this series has already been canceled. I need more Leverage, Burn Notice, and Battlestar Galactica!

Sometimes You Need To Drink Ambrosia Straight From The Bottle.

Wow that was a season beginning for Battlestar Galactica. When I saw Dee featured a lot in the review section I knew she was going to be big in the episode.


Poor Dee!


If Starbuck finds herself in the wreckage, what the hell is she? When Leobon is freaked out you know something has hit the fan.


If you guide humanity to a nuked paradise I can see why Laura Roslin would retreat to "I just don't care about anything." place. I'm sure burning a holy book leads you to a place in hell though.


Look out world, the old man is drunk and asking for a sidearm. The Admiral had the best line when asked what were they going to do now: I don't frakkin' know!


The Final Cylon is....you've got to be kidding me!


I'm waiting to see where this goes over the next 9 episodes, but somebody better start explaining things. There are way too many unanswered questions and I want a few things figured out! This is going to be one heck of a dark gritty ride I can tell.

"As God As My Witness I Thought Turkeys Could Fly"

After all these years the scene still holds up.

Army Of Darkness Explains So Much.

One friend of mine fails onto the Democrat side of the political spectrum. Our collective has a wide range of political views. Our collective is also full of smart asses. Combine those two traits with my friend and he came up with this little gem of political analysis. I don't care what your politics are you have to admit this is funny.

PS: If you haven't seen the Bruce Campbell classic Army Of Darkness you won't appreciate this as much.

John McCain (gesturing to the Bush administration): "You gotta believe me...I never even SAW these assholes before!"

Sarah Palin: "You found me beautiful once."
My Friend: "Honey, you got reeaal ugly."

Farewell To Opus

I love the character Opus, but I'm not fond of the comic Opus. Bloom County was awesome. Outland was simply a weak shadow of Bloom County. The third Berkley Breathed iteration was simply weak. Still it's nice to see Opus and Steve Dallas for a bit.

If you've been reading the comic you've been feeling the end coming. Perhaps it's time to finally say good bye. The Opus and the Shuttlechair Challenger must fly off into the sunset.

I Don't Want To Wait Until 2010.

Season 5, or if you're British Series 5, teaser for the return of Doctor Who. The ol' Doc gets another companion again. I love the power of the beats and the fiery looks. Sometimes less is more.

Why I Hate Television Network Schedulers.

Okay, what moron decided to put this new show Fringe opposite Eureka?

Seriously, I love Eureka. It is light hearted fun. I just saw the pilot to Fringe and I'm willing to give it a shot. A post 9-11 X-Files might be a good show if they have a coherent story line/mythology in mind already.

Oh well I'm sure my parents will record one, if not both of the shows. I can catch the good stuff later at their house.

I Hear Mulder And Scully Are On The Case.

Today we had, not one, but two paranormal news stories of infamous creatures.

1. Several people claim to have a Bigfoot body in Georgia (the state, not the place having a civil war with Russia). They're going to have a press conference on Friday to present their evidence. When I click on the link to see the pictures I'm wondering how do you stuff a Bigfoot into a freezer?

2. A sheriff's deputy in Texas has in-car video of the supposed chupacabra. After watching the video I don't see how it kills livestock and drinks their blood. Unless it's vampiric chupacabra and needs to put on the game face. Would that mean the even more mythical chupacabra slayer is out there? In every generation one is born correct?

Okay I've seen too many episodes of Monsterquest now.

I Disagree. Darth Vader Shall Always Be #1.

Lists are often created to be a source of debate. Someone came up with the list of the best movie villains of all time. I do like the list because it isn't focused solely on the modern era. It has villains from the 1930's, the 1950's, and many icons from the last 30 years. I'll give preview of some of my favorites; Khan, the T-1000 Terminator, and Hans Gruber are on the list. These are the villains that made the best of the good guys so good.

My problem with the list is Darth Vader is NOT #1. He has Jedi magic to kill insolent people with. He has a dark foreboding baritone voice. He had a Darth Star that destroyed planets. He chopped off his own son's hand. He dresses in all black and has a cape. He even a has iconic soundtrack! It is as if the list penalized Lord Vader for George Lucas' crappy rendition of his new trilogy. Darth Vader didn't even really exist until the middle of the middle of the third movie and the character shouldn't be penalized for that.

My Lord, when I finally turn to the Dark Side, you are the evil I aspire to be!

Quote Of The Day.

I finally figured out what a lot of these people need here. The Chuck Norris Roundhous Kick Of Justice! (tm)

Get Your Robot On.

Courtesy of So many book reviews. Sad to say I knew most of them and didn't need to guess but a few.

OnePlusYou Quizzes and Widgets

Put Captain Jack Harkness On The Case!

A Welsh police helicopter chased a "unusual aircraft" flying over the capital of Cardiff. The British tabloids exagerated the incident a bit, but it's obvious the police report never mentioned the phrase "UFO" for obvious reasons.

I'm not worried about it. Torchwood 3 is on the case by now!

Cool Science Facts.

Just learned this on The Universe. The planet Saturn as a hexagonal shaped feature at it's north pole. Imagine a hurricane shaped like a hexagon, a perfect hexagon! It could fit four Earths in the game, and is sixty miles deep.

DAMN!

Do You Get The Feeling "The Book Of Teal'c" Would Be A Dark Read?

Teal'c: Nothing I have done since turning against the Goa'uld will make up for the atrocities I once committed in their name. Somewhere deep inside you you knew it was wrong, a voice you did not recognize screamed for you to stop. You saw no way out, it was the way things were, they could not be changed. You're trying to convince yourself the people you're hurting deserved it. You became numb to their pain and suffering, you learned to shut out the voice speaking against it.

Tomin: There's always a choice.

Teal'c: Indeed there is.

Tomin: I chose to ignore it.

Teal'c: Yet you sit here now.

Tomin: I sit here, and I cannot imagine the day when I will forgive myself.

Teal'c: Because it will never come. One day others may try to convince you they have forgiven you, that is more about them than you. For them, imparting forgiveness is a blessing.

Tomin: How do you go on?

Teal'c: It is simple. You will never forgive yourself. Accept it. You hurt others, many others, that cannot be undone. You will never find personal retribution, but your life does not have to end. That which is right, just and true can still prevail. If you do not fight for what you believe in all may be lost for everyone else. But do not fight for yourself, fight for others, others that may be saved through your effort. That is the least you can do.



If you're a Stargate fan, then I give The Ark Of Truth dvd two thumbs up. Go rent or buy it now please.

Shiny New Toy.

The new laptop is sweet! It arrived about a week ago. What can I say about it? It works! Just having a functional computer that I can use is a nice change of pace compared to the last month or so. The fact it runs modern software is nice. Modern antivirus softwares are such system hogs the old laptop couldn't handle it. Now I can run a scan in the background and continue on with my work and online play.

I haven't had a chance to see how fast it is yet. Word docs open up pretty quickly though. Perhaps I'll load up a game around Christmas and blow stuff up quickly. The biggest was figuring out how to hook up my old printer. New laptops don't have parallel ports anymore. Luckily Printer/USB converter cables do exist. At $15 quite a steal too. Now why did the printer driver load up in Spanish?

I Can Dig It.

how jedi are you? :: by lawrie malen